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The Bard's Tale - A quest for coin and cleavage

The Bard's Tale is an action role-playing game created by InXile Entertainment, and published by Vivendi Universal Games in 2004. Vivendi marketed the game as a humorous spoof of fantasy role-playing video games. It is neither a remake nor a sequel to Interplay Productions' Tales of the Unknown, Volume I: The Bard's Tale (1985).

Overview of The Bard's Tale:

You play as the titular Bard, a roguish, manipulative and lewd songster whose priorities in life are the acquisition of material wealth and carnal pleasures. The Bard's pretty sarcastic by nature, but you get to decide just how scathing he is by selecting 'Nice' or 'Sarky' responses. Watch out you don't get too cocky though; folk you've upset may come back to haunt you.

During his raucous adventures, the Bard recruits a motley band of eccentrics and misfits to help in his ignoble cause. Enemies can be defeated using traditional or magical weapons and you can also use the Bard's dulcet tones to summon creatures. If you're tired of saving humankind or bored of games that take themselves a bit too seriously, The Bard's Tale could very well be for you.

“The Bard’s Tale is easily the funniest game I’ve ever played, and I’ve played all the funny games out there.” – IGN
“Ready your weapon and bladder as you embark on this ridiculously addicting quest and the funniest adventure of the year, The Bard’s Tale” – Game Chronicles
“This game is satire in its sharpest form” – Cheat Code Central

What's cool about The Bard's Tale:

  • Over 150 unique items of weaponry, armor, instruments, tokens, artifacts and loot!
  • A vast world to explore with towns, wild forests, rivers, castles, towers, secret dungeons, snowy mountains, caverns, haunted tombs and more!
  • Over 14 hours of outstanding voice-acting from top Hollywood talent, including Cary Elwes (The Princess Bride) as the Bard, and the inimitable Tony Jay as the Narrator.

Screenshots of The Bard's Tale:

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